Orgasm denial is a sexual practice often used by couples in BDSM relationships to tease and stimulate one partner almost to the point of climax. The whole point is to try to go so far that it’s almost certain that you or your partner will ejaculate, and to stop with any stimulation at the right moment just before it happens. However, you can do that when masturbating too.
The use of male chastity devices can also deny an orgasm. These sex toys exist to prevent the person wearing it from getting his penis erect. By doing so, these so-called cock cages eliminate the chance of ejaculation and reaching an orgasm.
It’s safe to say that orgasm denial is a great way to play the tease and deny game. Therefore, it’s an integral part of the BDSM community. Sadism and masochism just wouldn’t be the same without it.
Orgasm Denial in BDSM Practice
Like we’ve already said, orgasm denial is a well-known part of the game in the bondage-and-discipline subculture. But let’s talk a bit more in detail about how this kinky technique works in real life. Shall we?
For example, the dom will jack off their submissive male partner until they see that he’s going to cum. But just as he reaches the brink of orgasm, the dom will stop, denying their partner his pleasure and prolonging his misery. The whole point is that the dom will show him that he’s their property and that they will decide whether he’ll get the final satisfaction.
On the other hand, if the couple’s into chastity, he won’t even have the chance to get hard. But this time, the essence lies in the caged boy begging the key-holder to unlock him. Unfortunately for him and his little friend, the dom is not feeling lucky at the moment, and his desire will have to wait.
Last Longer in Bed
Of course, orgasm denial isn’t exclusive for “Fifty Shades of Grey” couples. It’s also used in your classic — we’d argue dull — relationships. Like we all know, some men have premature ejaculation problems. It’s fairly common, whether they are young, horny, and inexperienced, or they’re just feeling like that on that particular day.
But this is where orgasm denial comes into play for these normie couples. Guys who’d like to go on for a bit longer tend to master certain techniques for more fun. Not all of them want to end up like that Jimbo character from American Pie. Yeah, that late nineties teen comedy we all laughed at as kids (wink-wink).
Some people train hard not to be the guy that’s famous among the girls for blowing his load early. They tend to prepare themselves by masturbating regularly, and just before they ejaculate, they stop. They think they’ll get to know the exact moment their bodies signal them that they’re about to explode. This technique might prove useful, but unfortunately, it’s not like it’s going to work for everyone.
On the flip side, we’ve got guys who’d think pausing every so often while having sex will make it better. And it’s true; it will. But it will also break the flow, and your partner just might not stand for it. Therefore, it’s more than recommended you get on with your “problem,” and you’ll naturally adjust your body for orgasm control.
Make Orgasms More Intense
It’s easy to understand that prolonging yourself from ejaculating will only make the climax more intense. In a way, orgasm denial will feel like an explosion of a Coke bottle filled with mints. You could say that we’ve exaggerated a tiny bit here, but we assure you that not orgasming for some time will make it feel like nuking Hiroshima. Well, nuking in a good way, if you get what we mean.
Therefore, this technique isn’t a fairy tale. It’s real. People all around you are going for it. Whether it’s your BDSM friends or an elderly couple next door, bored to death form the same old missionary stuff, they play like this.
The whole postponing of the inevitable just makes the moment when it finally happens more grandiose. It’s like waiting for the New Year’s fireworks over the city panorama. The countdown slowly starts, but before the explosion happens, you cut the cord. Everyone’s expectations get reset, and you start again.
But once it happens, be sure you’re not aiming at your partner’s eyes, cause it’s going to get sticky as heck. Okay, we’ll stop. It’s not like a blockbuster movie scene, but it’s certainly better than blowing your load before the intercourse begins.
Edging is one of the most common techniques that people with premature ejaculation issues use. It has a lot of names, some call it surfing, while others refer to it as peaking, but the gist is the same. You want to control your own body and stop blowing your load earlier than you’d want to.
The whole process of edging is quite simple. While having intercourse or masturbating, you remain aware of the way your body’s reacting. And once you feel you’re going to come, you stop whatever you’re doing at the moment. To be a bit cheeky, you play on the edge (wink-wink).
It’s all about getting to know how your body functions while trying to spread bodily fluids. Therefore, you could say it’s a test and trial technique that needs frequent exercise for it to come to full fruition. Also, this method helps the person practicing it experience a bigger and better orgasm. Well, a longer one, if you’d like.
For example, if you’re willing to try it out while masturbating, you should do something like this. First, relax and take it easy. It’s not going to work immediately. Pull your pants down, reach for the bad boy, and slowly start rubbing it.
Once it starts to grow, begin stroking the penis. Don’t close your eyes, and don’t get lost in your horny thoughts. Be prepared to intercept the seamen coming from your testicles. When you start reaching the point of no return, stop stroking and relax for a half a minute.
And then, when your penis starts to release the pressure, do it again. Do this for about three to four times, and then go all the way and ejaculate. The difference between your regular and edged orgasm will be miles apart.
Set a Timer
Another cool way you could fix and up your sex life is by using the clock and the time it shows. Just like athletes do, you can prepare yourself and your body for better intercourse via short sessions and training. It’s somewhat similar to your regular gym exercise; you do a couple of push-ups, some time passes, you stop to rest, and repeat.
Don’t despair if you can’t last longer than a minute; it’s not a contest. So, don’t overestimate yourself by believing you can do it for an unrealistic period. It will only affect the way you feel about yourself.
There’s no shame in admitting to yourself on what level you currently stand. With time and practice, everything can change.
Also, another great way to incorporate time in sex is if you’re into BDSM activities. Safe-words are cool and all, but if your dominant partner decides to introduce a timer in your BDSM play, don’t hesitate. Restricting you from getting pleasure for more than a couple of minutes can really make the most of the domination and submission role-play exchange.
Even though we spent some time talking about ways to up your orgasms, we’d like to talk about something more long term. Denying a person from releasing their full body-fluid potential can be as frustrating as it’s rewarding. It’s a bit contradictory, but that’s how life is sometimes. Denying yourself or your partner from ever cumming can make all the difference once it comes to kinks and fantasies.
It’s fairly common among more experienced BDSM couples. The dom doesn’t allow their submissive slave to get any kind of satisfaction through an orgasm, but that, in turn, works great for them. It’s actually what they want, and it’s why they even got into sadism and masochism. People get off on being tortured and humiliated, and restricting a male from reaching a climax is just that.
So in this situation, the sub isn’t allowed to touch any erogenous zones that might lead to an unwanted orgasm. Therefore, teasing him over and over again ups the frustration to a whole other level. After all, you know what they say about forbidden fruit.
Use a Cock Cage
Male chastity devices are great for orgasm denial, and it’s pretty simple to see why. You restrict yourself from even getting a boner in the first place, let alone reaching a climax. These bondage and discipline sex toys are getting more prominent every year. Unlike in the medieval times, when men chained their ladies while they went around crusading, girls are putting boys in bars nowadays.
Cock cages are pure femdom and work great for every female-centric relationship. He gets the cage; she gets the keys. At least, that’s how it works most of the time. The lady becomes the dominant partner, as she controls whether her degraded sex slave will get his junk out or if he’s going to be reminded all the time that she’s the boss.
Oh, how the tables have turned!
These sex contraptions come in all sizes and designs, hence, getting the perfect one for you will be no problem. Just measure your willie properly — you can find out how to do it anywhere online — order the cage, and the game can begin. Also, if you’d like to make your own little penis cage, it won’t be a problem as there are countless custom-made ones all over the internet.
And finally, we need not remind you that before you act in such a way in a relationship, consent is paramount. We don’t recommend going for such actions if your partner didn’t fully agree about the idea. Therefore, be wise and act safely. It’s for the good of everyone involved.